Where am I?

Ashburn, VA. I went out last night for the first time in my immediate area. At 7 pm last night, I did not think I could think any worse of this place that I now call home. Little did I know what the night had in store for me. I picked up two of my nursing fellow nursing students (one of whom asked me later, between trills of laughter, if I had ever heard of the term 'niglet,' referring to the child of an African American person. great.) We drove 10 minutes to 'Bunkers,' a sports bar in Leesburg, whose doors opened onto a large cavernous space, lined on one side with easily 15 giant LCD TV screens and a long bar, over which were draped many lecherous drunk men. These men came in two varieties: hicks dressed in popped-collar Abercrombie shirts, hair gelled, looking approvingly or disapprovingly at the slabs of female meat wandering by (The females were all adorned with high heels and short skirts). The second type of male was the well-dressed foreigner, imported for their tech savy, equally lecherous and no less obvious about it. The other side of the building had a dance floor, where 4 or 5 people occasionally made half-hearted attempts to start a dance party, and where two girls in micro-mini lime-green skirts, black halter tops, and black boots that looked like someone cut off Chewbaca's legs below the knee, shimmied and swayed and flicked their hair about like cage girls in a bar that had an actual dance party present. I was immediately lobbying to leave, but was overruled. Unfortunately. We played some pool (my idea--the tables are in the back of the bar where there are less people to stare at you) and observed security attempt to hold a girl and a boy and their respective posses back from getting into a brawl. The girls i was with flirted and teased some poor Georgian boy who threw out marraige proposals like they were nothing (I myself got 3 or 4), complete with seductive licking of beer glass rims and sitting in his lap. I decided that it was the night to begin becoming a pool shark. At least it was something to focus on other than the mayhem around me.
I am too old for this. Seriously.